Speedster
Productions was founded in January, 1998 by David
Johnson after he skated death during massive off-road auto-excursion.
The car was not as lucky. This near-death experience enabled him to
see the err in his ways. No longer would he spend the precious moments
he has left on this earth producing mediocre parties. Instead, Dave
decided to start cranking out the sick sh*t... KickAss Party 2.0 is
representative of 12 months of Kick'n Ass and Taken Emails (Dave produces
a seminar series of the same name.)
In September 1998, Speedster Productions named Keith
Vollenweider as Chairman of the Board of Directors. Vollenweider's
responsibilities include involvement in innovative projects such as
CrashPad 2.1 using technology he developed at the University of Zurich.
Vollenweider is also instrumental in the global promotion of key products
such as KickAss Party 2.0.
"This
is a totally KickAss step for the company,' says CEO David Johnson,
citing the 69% increase in sales since Vollenweider spearheaded the
release of KickAss Party 1.0 less than three months ago. "His experience
and in-depth knowledge of the party industry is truly KickAss!"
Since
his indictment, Speedster Productions is proud to have named President
of the United States, Bill Clinton as Director
of Public Relations. Clinton's responsibilities will include head
of project development for KissMyAss 2.0, an innovative new approach
to the age old game of Sorry. Clinton has a long and documented history
of being able to do two at once, thus adding in the delicate planning
and preparation of KickAss Party 2.0.
With
the new millennium quickly approaching, Speedster Productions is proud
to have recently named super computer HAL-9000
as Chief Information Officer. We have been assured that all y2k problems
have been completely erraticated and that our new CIO will be able
to provide enough processing power for SPI well into the year 1901.
Speedster
Productions, Inc. ignited the San Jose wasteland of metered on-ramps
and strip malls with its release of KickAss Party 1.0. They are dedicated
to the seeking out and destroying of complacency, boredom, and all alcoholic
commodities, while continuing to maintain the highest degree of pride
in their quality of workmanship. Speedster Productions is ISO-69 Certified.
Press Contacts:
Dave Johnson
Speedster Productions, Inc.
Keith Vollenweider
Speedster Productions, Inc.
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the Apple logo, and Sherlock are registered trademarks of Apple Computer,
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trademarks of the individual companies and are respectfully acknowledged.